Thursday, September 18, 2008

4 years ago today...

The Art of Marriage

The little things are the big things.
It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say “I love you” at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is at no time taking the other for granted; the courtship should not end with the honeymoon, it should continue all through the years.
It is having a sense of mutual values and common objectives.
It is standing together facing the world.
It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family.
It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy.
It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is not expecting your husband to wear a halo or your wife to have wings of an angel.
It is not looking for perfection in each other.
It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding, and a sense of humor.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.
It is finding room for the things of the spirit.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is establishing a relationship in which independence is equal, dependence is mutual, and obligation is reciprocal.
It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.


Four years ago today I married my best friend. Over the last four years we have seen a lot of changes. Our family has grown, our location changed, we have lost loved ones, and welcomed new loves into our lives. And while I can't say that I have always abided by the wisdom in the words so lovingly read by Aunt Donna at our wedding 4 years ago, I can say that I am still married to my best friend, there have been more good days than bad (a lot more good days), and I wouldn't change a minute of it for anything in the world. I am so lucky to have an amazing husband, two beautiful, smart, and fun little girls, and while we are by no means rich (according to our bank account) we are not starving either. The last four years have been a journey and one that I have been glad to take. I am excited to see where our journey will continue (hopefully back to MN soon!). So thank you to all of you who gathered with us four years ago to begin this amazing adventure and thank you even more for sticking by us, supporting us, and sculpting us into the people we are today.